I was raised by struggling parents who had four children by their early 20s, so naturally, dysfunction and chaos were the norm in our home. My father was beaten as a child and was still filled with rage. My mother was adopted and an alcoholic. My survival strategy was to drop my authentic self so I could become the emotional support for both my parents and my siblings. Because parents and society don't address childhood pain and adversities or equip us with the tools we need, like so many others, my adult life became a re-enactment of that unhealed pain.
I struggled through several addictions and married two narcissistic women, one of whom was physically and verbally abusive and alienated our children from me. I went bankrupt fighting for them, and I see now that I played two professional sports I never wanted to play. The subconscious replaying of my unhealed childhood pain culminated in my spending three days holed up in my apartment, trying to write a suicide note to my children. But when I tried to justify my choice, I just couldn't. Every time I tried to write a sentence, I realized there was no way I could take my life without ultimately transferring my pain to my children. What saved us both was the nearly 30 years of research, reading, studying, going to seminars, and working with counselors trying to get a handle on my pain.
At that moment, I had an epiphany: something is drastically missing in society and the personal development field, after all of this effort, I shouldn’t be in this pain. I went directly into my office and wrote down these words.
"I want to come up with a revolutionary process no one else has discovered that will fundamentally change society, the personal development field, and how we help people heal!"
Over the past nine years, that is exactly what I have done. Unlike most who go right from their traumatic childhoods into school and then begin a career as a helping professional, I have spent decades working on myself before becoming a guide, teacher, and healer for others, giving me a unique, nearly one-of-a-kind understanding of what is really transpiring inside of us and how to help people heal. I have not only researched and studied the journey out of the dark into the light, I have lived it.